Monday, October 17, 2011

How do you manage it?

So all you mums with more than one child – HOW DO YOU DO IT??

The further along in this pregnancy I get, the more and more I start to worry about how the hell I’ll cope with a baby and a toddler.

Of course you just “do it” and you somehow manage to get through the days, but are there any tips or tricks for how to better manage it?

I’ve been thinking back on the early days with Skye – unfortunately she had colic and silent reflux - but we didn’t realise she had reflux til she was older, and it explained A LOT.

Anyway, I vividly remember some days where it would take me 2 + hours to get her to settle off to sleep, often with non-stop screaming along the way. Only to have her sleep for 20 minutes, wake screaming for a feed, and go through it all again. Exhausting. I would come out of her room after hours of burping and settling her, to flop on the couch and cry. Quite a stressful time.

We tried everything to fix the colic/reflux, but sadly the only remedy was time, and putting her on solids at 4 months as advised by the doctor.

Obviously I had the time to spend settling a colicky/refluxy baby back then – but I will not have that luxury this time.

Of course we’re hoping to not have a second unsettled baby. I’d like to officially place my order for one of those “dream” babies you hear about!!

Unfortunately, both reflux and colic runs in my husbands family – they AAALLLLL had either one or the other, even his niece and nephew. However there is none in my family, so we can but hope.

This bub is MUCH quieter and less active than Skye was. Skye was beating me up internally, constantly, from about 16 weeks onwards – all day AND all night. She never seemed to stop kicking me or constantly hiccuping while in utero. And she’s totally active now, never stops. This bub though seems MUCH more sedate. Sometimes I get a bit worried because I haven’t had much movement – and then I get a good strong kick or feel it "squirm" and feel better.

Anyway, I’ve bought a Maya Wrap/ring sling to try, as I’ve heard that baby-wearing can help. I’ve also got a Baby Bjorn carrier too from last time. I’m thinking that this bub might just have to learn to sleep on the run, in the swing or in the baby carrier. Or else I might just have to buy some noise-cancelling ear phones!


Liz@LastChanceTraining said...

It will be OK Hils - we all survive it - but it's not always easy. With my second baby, I didn't have the luxury of settling her for 2 hours so I just popped her in the cot from day one, well wrapped and she learned to self settle really quickly. Necessity is the mother of invention and I know that in your way, you will cope just fine.

Hilary said...

Thanks Liz - thats what I'm thinking - this baby will just have to "get on with it" and learn quickly! Still a bit daunting though!

The Stark's said...

Hi Hilary

Just wanted to let you know that my first son screamed constantly day and night with colic. When pregnant with the second (and second husband) I warned husband what it was going to be like and then Sofie came along and made a liar of me by sleeping through the night (9 or 10 hours) from 4 days old and then just slept and fed for months. She was one of those dream babies you hear about.

So, it does happen and I'm praying this is the case for you too.

As for fit and healthy - do what you have to do to cope the best you can. It is the early years that are most important in shaping and they're only little once so take the pressure off yourself babe.

I know you'll do just fine.


linda said...

I think you'll be surprised at how well you cope! Don't forget you are now an experienced mum and it never is as scary the second time around. I found I have taken ( and still am!) things with my 2nd child much more in my stride. With my 1st child everything has been much more of a drama! It's amazing how well we do cope when all this work is thrown at us- keep smiling:))

Hilary said...

Thanks Shelley - I have my fingers crossed for an easier baby this time around. I do agree too that I need to not put so much pressure on myself, its hard not to I suppose!

Thanks Linda - Its true that its not as scary the 2nd time around, just different things to worry about! I know we'll get through it, its just a bit daunting :)

Hilds said...

Yeah, I don't know how people have these huge families, one kid can be hard enough. Hilary, I'm sure you will have a perfect little angel baby that will sleep all the time. They say that the second kid just slots in and has to fit in so they tend to be a bit easier.

After the week I've had I take my hat off to any single Mums as it's heaps harder on your own.

Hope all is going great!


Tracey said...

9 year age gap has worked well for me but sorry no help for you. I am not sure how anyone does it with more than one littly. I am sure you will work it out.